I have often written about the duality of grief. The joy of milestones and holidays is so often overshadowed by the sadness of loss. As my husband’s birthday approaches, I feel this duality take hold of me. How much I want to celebrate his life, his triumphs over challenges, his extraordinary abilities as a father, his caring personality, his selflessness, and the loving husband he was. Celebrating all of that was so easy when he was here, but now his birthday is a painful re