After my husband passed away, someone sent me this newspaper clipping about death, and how the person is still present, but has only, “slipped away into the next room”. I often think of this, and it has given me much peace. “I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged". I recently visited my youngest daughter, a junior in college, and spent the weekend with her. As I watched her with her friends, I felt overwhelmingly pro

I have often written about the duality of grief. The joy of milestones and holidays is so often overshadowed by the sadness of loss. As my husband’s birthday approaches, I feel this duality take hold of me. How much I want to celebrate his life, his triumphs over challenges, his extraordinary abilities as a father, his caring personality, his selflessness, and the loving husband he was. Celebrating all of that was so easy when he was here, but now his birthday is a painful re

I often find myself dividing time into two distinct periods: "Before his death" and "After his death." This framework has come to define much of my adult life; there is such a stark contrast between how we were before losing my husband and how we navigate life now. The world itself has transformed significantly in these eight years. The convenience of ordering something on your phone and having it arrive at your doorstep within hours, the changes in education with virtual cla

There is a wholly and completely different kind of grief that begins to happen after the dust settles on a loved one’s passing. One that...

A friend mentioned to me the other day that her husband was talking about my late husband. The feeling of love enveloped me, and the...

High Anxiety… I never saw the movie, but I can certainly relate to the title. These past seven years, I have found many helpful ways to...

8/3/23 A few things about my dad: my earliest memory of him was driving around Queens, a Marlboro red in one hand, the other on the...

The worst thing that has ever happened to me has become the thing that I am most grateful for. I recently heard someone say this during...

A few weeks ago, a close friend lost her father, she was grieving and said to me, “How do you know when there is a sign”? I wouldn’t say...

06/12/2020 As soon as Memorial Day rolls around, I know it coming. The influx of commercial propaganda about Father’s Day. It slams me...

5/5/2020 To my beautiful children, Although today is not Daddy’s actual Yahrzeit, I often feel, to some extent, it is. Four years ago...

12/17/19 Thanksgiving has been the most challenging holiday for me since my husband passed 3.5 years ago. It has been the hardest...

11/7/19 One of my most treasured possessions are cards, cards that my husband wrote to me over the years. He didn’t just give me cards on...

10/15/2019 My husband died when he was fifty. To say that this is a milestone I’ve been looking forward to would simply be false for...

9/30/19 Dear Olivia, This is not the letter I envisioned writing to you 18 years ago. The letter I most likely would have written you...

6/10/2019 Some people become widows in the blink of an eye, a tragic accident or sudden death, and some become widows after what I can...

5/24/19 Tomorrow marks 3 years that you have been gone. Gone from this earth, from me and our beautiful children. The overwhelming...

10/18/18 I have a birthday approaching, my third birthday. The third one as a widow; I will be 49 this year. I still tend to separate...